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Trapped

Discussion in 'Awesome Media' started by xoyoungdreamerox, Feb 19, 2005.

  1. xoyoungdreamerox

    xoyoungdreamerox OMG Member

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    Trapped

    Trapped - Complete Piece
    It cries, but has no eyes

    it screams, but has no lips

    it wreathes, but has no body

    it claws, but has no hands

    it kicks, but has no feet

    it escapes, but has no route

    it is trapped

    Copyright ?2004 xoyoungdreamerox [ s.b.]
     
  2. OP
    xoyoungdreamerox

    xoyoungdreamerox OMG Member

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    Hi, all

    Any comments on this? Scary... or what?
     
  3. Pyro

    Pyro OMG Member

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    Thanks for posting, first of all :) I appologize it took me so long to get to your poem. The poem is straight personifcation - which could be a good or bad thing. It might be overally simple, but then again, sometimes simple is good. It depends mainly on the writers preference. I like how you put in the "it is trapped' at the end though. It's definatly a good idea, and I like the way you did it. However, it *might* be overally simple, but if it works for you. I do like it though ;)
     
  4. Madigan

    Madigan OMG Member

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    Is this poem by any chance describing a soul?...Or perhaps hope?
    Or maybe it is talking about fear itself? I've reread it a few times trying the figure out what it might be about.
     
  5. OP
    xoyoungdreamerox

    xoyoungdreamerox OMG Member

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    Hi, you know- I dont know what it is I was just letting it rip o.o ^.^;;; Sorry for the dissappointment and thanks for the compliments.
     
  6. Madigan

    Madigan OMG Member

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    Never a dissapointment Youngdreamer.
    Not at all. Sorry if that's the impression I gave.
    I guess I merely perceived it as a puzzle of sorts and what trying to figure it out.
    It is well written and I did enjoy reading it.
    Keep it up!;)
     
  7. Davidk

    Davidk OMG Member

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    Good job on choosing the words. I suggest proper grammatical rules though, especially when posting something for critique-not meant to be negative- I really like your work. I also thought it was like a puzzler of some sorts, but I guess it can be applied to alot of things in life.

    Good job, I hope to hear more!
    -David
     
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