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Victim

Discussion in 'Awesome Media' started by Diana Notacat, Mar 29, 2005.

  1. Diana Notacat

    Diana Notacat OMG Member

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    Victim

    I am trying to be a contributing member of society! Weee!

    I am not a poet. Infact, I loathe poetry and I wish to stomp on it! I have written next to nothing except a couple songs recently for a character of mine... But I thought I would share my "first" poem I wrote ages ago whilst I was still in school... one I actually like because it's...well... I'd like to know what others think of this. XD So more than critique I'd looove to hear what this makes people picture.

    VICTIM

    May god rein down on you,
    and rip the life you well know you don't deserve away.
    May hell swallow your inner soul,
    torture you till kingdom come,
    even though you won't be admitted.
    Go to confession,
    repent all you can.
    Your evil ways prove you other wise than good.
    Just hope Satan looks more kindly than I,
    May God look more kindly than I,
    but I am the victim.
    You'll never see forgiveness from me.
     
  2. xoyoungdreamerox

    xoyoungdreamerox OMG Member

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    Geez, I'm for the mosy part a flower child. That poem would scare me away and give me nightmares for weeks, of course there was a time when I two used to right poems of darkness, hate and loathing. Other than it being scary and dark o.o good job. o.o Power to muh people.
     
  3. OP
    Diana Notacat

    Diana Notacat OMG Member

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    Bwaha.. thankies... it is indeed the most wicked thing I've ever written...
     
  4. Pyro

    Pyro OMG Member

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    Violent :) At first read, it looked more like a string of vicious insults than a poem, but I think it does have some kind of charm to it. Plus you wrote it in school, and school seems to suck the creative energy out of every author. For someone who dislikes poetry, I think this is a good start. Keep it up though, sometimes writing things outside your familiarity does indeed work.
     
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